Transcript Of Cell Phone Conversation Between Brad Pitt And Jennifer Aniston

The following is a transcript of a cell phone conversation that was recorded by a ham radio operator stationed in New Orleans. The recording was made in the late evening of July 12, 2006. The operator had a radio unit purchased on the internet from Romania which had the capacity to pick up the wavelength band used by cell phone providers. The unit was operated in violation of FCC rules, and so the ham operator was unwilling to release possession of the recording she made of the conversation, nor was she willing to permit us to use her name. She was kind enough though to permit Parodical to listen to the recording, and we transcribed the conversation to the best of our ability. Where we could not make out a word, we say so. From the conversation, Parodical believes this was a conversation between Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston. You can decide for yourself. The following is the transcript:
Aniston: I don't want to talk.
Pitt: Listen, it's important that we (garbled).
Aniston: No.
Pitt: One night.
Aniston: No.
Pitt: I'm in Santa Barbara, you can take the (garbled).
Aniston: Reading screenplays?
Pitt: Yeah.
Aniston: So who are you (garbled) up in Santa Barbara?
Pitt: No one.
Aniston: I know what “reading screenplays" means Brad. You think I am stupid.
Pitt: It sounds like you care. You're getting emotional.
Aniston: It's late. I have to go.
Pitt: I can come to Chicago.
Aniston: Oh right, like no one will know you are here.
Pitt: We'll meet in cars. By the lake somewhere.
Aniston: You trying to get romantic?
Pitt: No. I am trying to (garbled) so we can (garbled).
Aniston: Send me an email. I'm not meeting in cars.
Pitt: Just a brief time together. I need to figure something out.
Aniston: I have to go.
Pitt: Please.
Aniston: I have to go.
Pitt: I just need to (sound of a click) Jenn, Jenn.
The conversation ended there.